Some people don’t love themselves just because none tries to love them.
Because none shows them love. 
None ever said to them that they are beautiful.
Beautiful just the way they are.
Just because their OWN family treats them as useless things.
That’s why they don’t love themselves.
Because they feel that they don’t belong in their own family.
Because they are being insulted there, where they needs to be loved.
That’s why they hate themselves. Hate.
Just because they don’t feel the love from world..
Because none wants to give them love..

I can’t see you

And I can’t feel you anymore.

Your odor little by little leaving my home..

The one who never forgets.

Is the one who is forgotten. 

Even if this world tries to pull you down.

Find your broken dreams again. Don’t say that you can’t.

I never thought that it can happen to me.

I always was so sorry, and pity to those people who is going thought it..

And now when I think.. none can help you. None can make you feel better.

Nothing makes pain go away. Nothing will change..

I wish none of you, would feel this..go thought it..god, I wouldn’t wish it even to my enemy..

To see how mother cries every morning. How she tries to be strong.

And sisters…

There is no laugh right now in my house…

How I wish to make his pain..even a little easier.. 

I love you dad..more than anyone..

Wouldn’t it be the easiest way just to quit this fucking life?
It would. And it bothers me all the time. Cuz I’m a coward.

Doesn’t it scares you to think, what if, you will be alone forever?
What if all those thoughts, wishes won’t come true? 
To have a husband or wife, kids. Like all normal people does.
What if you will be that one from the few, who doesn’t have anything?
Who didn’t got anything. Who tried, but failed. And never reached his dreams.
Who is left only with his tragically sad soul. Alone.
It’s scares. It’s scares me. 


The worst feeling is when you being humiliated all the time in your own family. 
OWN family.
There is no happiness to be the youngest in family.